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Question to you with teenagers or slightly older

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Vinny:
I have a 17 YO who has to work for what he wants. It seems that he is an oddity around here. It seems that a lot of "kids" have the full financial backing of their parents.

He pays for his car insurance, gas and when he wants to go out with his friends. We do throw him money sometimes if he's short of cash but generally he uses his own money. Before he drove, he cut the grass and did chores around the house for money but we footed the bill for going out.

What do you do?

Thanks!

96SC:
Ours had part time jobs when they hit 16.  We did cover car insurance and any drastic shortages (things that would have taken a big chunk out of their pockets that were unavoidable).  
When they started college and had to study more and work less we covered for them a bit more, but they both moved into a house and paid their own way mostly. :-/

Spatech_tuo:
This hits close to home. I have a friend who is a grocery store manager and I got my son (just turned 17 a couple weeks ago) a job a few months ago at one of their stores. After 2 months of working 24 to 30 hrs a week he decided "I’ve saved a few hundred $$, I want to take the summer off". I almost laughed but I just calmly explained that was not an option unless he planned to never go to the movies, drive, have cable/internet access, etc. I explained that the gravy train has pulled away from the station and he is permanently in the working world at least part time. He likes having $$ and after he quickly spent his first few checks he seems to be able to keep a decent balance in his account (a teen checking account I got him so he can manage his $$).

He's tried a few methods to get out of work like "the boss asked me to go get her a Starbucks, how degrading", "half my friends don't work the summer, only during school" or "they are giving me too many hours" etc. I just said "ask for fewer hours or get another job but you're not quitting unless you have another job lined up".

Meanwhile his 15½ yr old brother is itching to get a job but it’s not so easy at his age. I'm hoping we can get him on a payroll so his brother will feel foolish wanting to "hang out" for the summer.

Why do I feel like I lived through the Depression and kids nowadays just don't get it. I've become my father!!!!!

Jacuzzi Jim:
 I like the replies so far!    My 7 1/2 old should be home stacking wood as we speak, he does a laundry run in the morning and is able to switch over and sort it as well when we ask him.   He also helps me mow the lawn, they are not very straight lines and I am always right there by him but its the thought that counts.   And yes we do pay him and are really trying to instill the value of a dollar and working for it.


 My 3 1/2 old girl Jaime helps Trent with the laundry when needed, feeds the guinea pigs and the cat, and helps with general pick ups around the house.

Vinny:
I asked this question because it really seems that we are the odd balls around here.

He had a PT job at McD beginning the last school year and he was having problems juggling High School, Marching Unit, SAT prep course and the job so we told him to quit the job. School at this point is the most important thing he has to worry about and we felt we would carry him a little further. Because he left on great terms they hired him back.

Car insurance in NJ is expensive for kids and I agreed to put him under our insurance with the stipulation that he HAS TO be a careful driver. I warned him that he would have to pay the $4000 for insurance vs the $750 he's paying now or give up his license as I am not paying for the cost of his mistake.

The kids he knows are being handed cars, insurance, gas money and spending money. Some of these parents are buying their kids BMW's as their first car. I'm certainly not in their league.

I keep explaining to him that these kids are going to be in for a huge let down when Mommy and Daddy's money isn't there any more. He understands but he feels the pressure at times. I was in a store yesterday and listening to a 20 YO talk about purchasing something and his final comment was 'I don't care it's not my money it's my dad's".

Yeah, I am my father too ... scary thing is as I grow older my dad looks back at me every time I look in the mirror! ;D

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